Well, well, well. This track was written in 2019 and an unofficial release of the track came out in 2020 on SoundCloud. I wasn't happy with the final mix and master of the unofficial release, so I held off on releasing it until I could finish work on it. So here it is!
This song has special meaning to me, as it was inspired by a time that I lost everything and thankfully regained my life that day. I truly believed I went to the spirit world when I took too much LSD, Marijuana and Alcohol that day. My world, my sense of self, sense of time, space and ego disappeared. I went into a timeless void, and all I seen was infinite shapes, sizes, sounds and loops. I WAS SCARED!!
I was stuck for what felt like months in this void and honestly felt like I passed on. It wasn't until I started recognizing voices, people's spirits near me and objects appearing in the void of tracers, that I felt myself coming back. All of my negative emotions, thoughts and beliefs connected me to my neural pathways of my brain again. Boom, I recognized who I was, what I've been through and what was actually holding me together between worlds. Negative self thoughts and beliefs.
I later began to come back from this void and felt extreme gratitude to be somewhere and see something, rather than nothing. I felt being in pain and dealing with my past was a million times more better than being in a void of nothingness. From here, I determined that I wanted to change my life and heal from my traumas. This experience changed my life and led me to find the goodness in life, no matter how hard it was.
I wrote this song as a way to explain how I felt and how scary this experience was for me. The tension, emotion and chants are tools I use to express myself in this song, in this moment and my return. I am grateful for being alive and having time, space, sound and self, vs what is out there as a possibility. Lucid is my experience and what I want to share with those that feel like they have hit rock bottom as well. Life gets better and that rabbit hole gets deep, if one is brave enough to go. Stay here with us, trust me. This is how we connect, between you and me.